Friday is a notoriously bad time to post on the internet as few read online content over the weekend.

Donna: What’s take out the trash day?
Josh: Friday.
Donna: I mean, what is it?
Josh: Any stories we have to give the press that we’re not wild about, we give all in a lump on Friday.
Donna: Why do you do it in a lump?
Josh: Instead of one at a time?
Donna: I’d think you’d want to spread them out.
Josh: They’ve got X column inches to fill, right? They’re going to fill them no matter what.
Donna: Yes.
Josh: So if we give them one story, that story’s X column inches.
Donna: And if we give them five stories …
Josh: They’re a fifth the size.
Donna: Why do you do it on Friday?
Josh: Because no one reads the paper on Saturday.
Donna: You guys are real populists, aren’t you?

(Granted, Lonestarmets isn’t the NY Post, but it is Friday and no one reads on the weekend.)

Evil Incarnate

The next time you roll your eyes reading the next inside scoop of a rookie forced to shave his head, carry veteran’s luggage or wear a dress while traveling, think of the very things those unwritten rites of passage likely prevent.

What the seemingly pointless hazing and sophomoric initiations prevent are the same things that plague the National Football League.

I’ve waited a few days to even mention the atrocities of the Falcon’s Quarterback due to a combination of disgust, shock and bewilderment. For the past few days I have been asking myself, “what kind of person would do that?” Michael Vick allegedly committed acts so unbelievably evil they have solely been previously committed by super-villains in 80’s B-Rate movies and serial killers during development ages. What kind of a human being kills puppies by gunshot, electrocution, body slamming and hanging? I do realize there are other individuals accused that aren’t franchise NFL Quarterbacks, and those individuals are equally sorry sub-humans.

I had speculated with a friend that the justifications will soon surface that dog-fighting is acceptable in the ‘Rap-culture’ so prevent in sports today.

Here we go folks; I predict a Don Imus-esque debate coming very soon, look for the race card to be played in five, four, three, two…

The Beckham’s are in America

As if anyone, other than reality TV viewers give a damn that one of the stars of a late 90’s manufactured pop group and the biggest star of a half assed second tier sport (in America, anyway) now make their residence in the states. Well some care like Tom Cruse and Katie Holmes who will be hosting the Beckham’s Scientology indoctrination welcome party in Los Angeles. Has anyone heard her talk? She sounds like a bad cliché British cartoon character,

“A lot o girls ere don’t wear any knickers; you can’t have any pudding if you don’t eat your meat, gov’na.”

14:59, 14:58, 14:57, 14:56, 14:55, 14:54…

Enjoy your time with the Cruise’s now, Posh; I’m looking forward to watching you make out with MC Hammer on The Simple Life!

FBI Probes Allegations on NBA Ref Wagering on Games

According to a law enforcement official, authorities are examining whether the referee made calls to affect the point spread in games on which he or associates had wagered.

If you watch today’s NBA you have to hand it to this referee. I wonder if he ever got confused between protecting his wagering list and the list of stars the NBA gave him to protect. All the facts are not evident at this time though billionaire and Supercuts regular Mark Cuban was seen making pelvic air thrusts and making obscene sexual suggestions about what NBA Commissioner David Stern could do with himself.

If you watch today’s NBA you have to hand it to this referee. I wonder if he ever got confused between protecting his wagering list and the list of stars the NBA gave him to protect. All the facts are not evident at this time though billionaire and Supercuts regular Mark Cuban was seen making pelvic air thrusts and making obscene sexual suggestions about what NBA Commissioner David Stern could do with himself.