Greetings from sunny Irving, Texas, home of the 13-4 Dallas Cowboys who are the NFC Favorite biggest disappointment the Metroplex area has seen since The Benefactor the Mavericks got eliminated in the first round of the NBA Playoffs by Golden State.

Boo hoo (tee-hee)

Pardon my glee derived from other’s shortcomings. For those of you not familiar with the area perhaps I may enlighten you as to why the Cowboys elimination brings me so much guilty pleasure:

Cowboy Fans = Yankee Fans = Laker Fans

Today is a day I almost called in sick just to listen to the radio all day and Cowboy fans go through the seven stages of grief:

Disbelief: The mighty Romo was bested by the Manning of lesser evils?

Denial: The refs screwed us, man. That last pass wasn’t an interception, it was a Cowboy Touchdown!

Bargaining: Maybe if we admit that Barber is on the juice then we can have the league review the game, best of three??…

Guilt: Maybe we didn’t deserve to win against Carolina, Green Bay, Detroit or Buffalo. Maybe I shouldn’t have spent so much time whacking off to my Tony Romo Jessica Simpson poster. Karma’s a bitch.

Anger: That damned Jessica Simpson and her fake boobs. If our quarterback had an attention span larger than a fruit fly maybe he could remember the snap count or how to smirk.

Depression: When’s the last time a Dallas team got passed the first round of anything, the 99 Stars? Where’s my Jessica Simpson poster?

Acceptance: I guess the Cowboys are as overrated as Jessica Simpson. I am a bad person for calling myself a fan as much as I am a bad person for spening twelve bucks to see Blonde Ambition.

Christmas came twice for me this year, once on December 25th and again the entire month of January. First Roger now this, what more could I ask for? Maybe a big trade?

The 2007 Dallas Cowboys: One and DONE!