I’ve never heard of half these guys, and the ones I have are way past their primes.
This guy’s dead!
Cross him off then

I realize Spring Training is for the benefit of pitchers and that it is important that younger players get exposure to the organization in general. I am also quite aware that half the team is in casts and walking boots but none of that changes the fact that it’s all really boring. Come on, admit it. You’re not fooling anyone.

Since I haven’t posted today, and since we likely won’t see any of these players this season, maybe not even next season, I thought I would take the opportunity to randomly nickname Friday’s starting lineup:

LF Ezequiel “Tia” Carrera
SS Anderson “Black Powder” Hernandez
CF Angel “Gay-bo” Pagan
DH Olmedo Saenz- He was funny on SNL
C Raul “Sneezey” Casanova
RF Fernando “Buckshot” Martinez
1B Robinson Cancel –Doesn’t he play for the Yankees? I think they made this name up.
3B Dan “Motown” Murphy (every group needs a Motown)
2B Argenis “One-time” Reyes

Scoff now, but in 2010 you’ll be a Citi Field when the PA system booms, “Now batting, number 32, Argenis Reyes” and you’ll yell, “Let’s go One-time!” You can thank me later.

Let’s face it, the big story “Santana in Mets Camp” has grown tired. What this year’s Mets camp needs is a “feel good” story. Like a handicap square dance caller trying to make the team despite only having one leg and being legally color blind. He can’t judge pitches or see the base coach’s signs and has difficulty taking a lead without getting picked off. Also, he can’t field very well but his effort and sheer determination earns him a spot on the opening day roster along with the nickname, “Old Hoppy.” He’d earn the respect of teammates and coaches until, after being five minutes late for a team meeting (the meeting was help upstairs), he gets cut on April 2nd for violating team rules. Endless mocking from opposing teams, for instance “hey, your first baseman only has one leg!” leads the Mets front office realizes how ridiculous it is to carry a player with one leg on a Major League roster. But what a ride it would be!

March 31st can’t get here soon enough…

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