Take Me Out From the Ballpark

Getting thrown out from a major league ballpark isn’t exactly on most fans’ wish lists, but there are always those who get a wicked thrill from an attention-grabbing stunt that ends with someone being escorted out by security – or worse yet – in handcuffs.  In many situations, these guys aren’t just run-of-the-mill hecklers.  They’re diehard fans of the team they’re watching, and don’t seem to put 2+2 together and realize that running across the outfield – clothed or not – could get them banned from the park, or even from all facilities in the league.

The offenses people are most commonly aware of, besides streaking (after all, who doesn’t notice a naked guy running from third base through center field?), include throwing belongings from the stands, interfering with a live play, and getting into a fight with fans from the away team.  Not only can these acts get you booted from the park, they can also earn you the ire of the crowd, both inside the stadium and at home, watching on television.  Those fans with sticky fingers who just can’t help but reach out and grab a fly ball for themselves, only to realize they robbed someone of a critical out, are often so hated afterward that the local news covers them and they receive threat letters for weeks after the incident.  You’d be better off streaking from first base ‘round to home plate than stealing a homerun from the home team.

So unless getting dragged out of the park in handcuffs with hums of ‘Take Me Out to the Ballgame’ lingering in the distance is your idea of a summer day well spent, stay and watch the game at home, especially if you can’t keep your hands – or your clothes – to yourself.

Posted under Angry Rant

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