I really don’t want to relive last night’s game. Instead, here’s a subject that doesn’t make me angry…

For no reason whatsoever I’ve found myself watching John Cusack movies lately. Despite a rash of bad moves, not unlike Mathew Broderick, I really can’t explain exactly why I like him so much. Something about the man’s ability to play a miserable hero and his tendency to make dark comedies resonates with me. I thought I would make my top five list of Cusack comedies. Note that Eight Men Out as I don’t consider it a true Cusack movie nor is it a comedy. Get it? Ok, here we go:

#1 Better off Dead: Sure it’s an 80’s movie and over the top but something can be said for overstated dark humor and this movie still works today. This movie’s gold is in its more subtle humor rather than it’s slapsticky humor. Unwarranted musical scene and unique characters (Mailman, drag racing Asian guys, one who talks like Howard Cosell and a bad guy actually named Roy Stalin.). Rickey Smith’s entrance during the school dance scene is one of the greatest musical entrances and dance routines ever in cinema. I had to buy that guy a new hat last time.

#2 High Fidelity: I underrated this movie for years. Probably because it featured Jack Black before audiences figured out he lacks the range to play anyone but Jack Black. (Recipe for a Jack Black role: write a scene in which his character can protrude his stomach, stick his chin out, have him point all five of his fingers and palms upward and make awkward spins and contortions singing something like, “Rickiy-ticki-do-rickey-dickey-do. How did that man become a star?) This one is somewhat morbid, dark comedy at its finest. John Cusack talking to the camera the entire film is enough to get over he and Black’s pretentious music aficionado characters. Bonus points for a pre-megastar, pre-Michael Douglas Catherine Zeta-Jones as the third love interest Charlie and of course a Bruce Springsteen cameo. Double bonus points for the deflowering of a Cosby kid.

#3 Grosse Point Blank: Minnie Driver before she was annoying and the always funny Alan Arkin as Cusack’s psychiatrist is priceless. One of my favorite all time lines “You can never go home again Oatman, but I guess you can shop there.“ Some priceless banter among characters puts this one at number three. Another one time Cusack roommate Ari Gold appearance. Points deducted for Dan Aykroyd appearance. This one just barely made number three over…

#4 Say Anything: A unconventional teen romantic movie known for the boom box over the head scene is more than the sum of it’s parts. This movie didn’t fit into pedantic ideas of what a romantic comedy is supposed to be. The father was actually a criminal (I never trusted Frasier’s father) and a great ending. Bonus points for Jeremy Piven appearance and naming the lead character Lloyd Dobler.

#5 Sixteen Candles: Not really a Cusack movie but he was in it and I could not in good conscience put One Crazy Summer in the top five, despite it being the vehicle to launch Demi Moore’s singing career. Same with Pushing Tin and America’s Sweethearts for obvious reasons. (Note: I’ve become a puzzled Asian scientist.)

Sorry for the lack of posts, I’ve been very ill (Ebola) and was unable to write the past few games and got too frustrated with Figueroa to post about the game.

Motherhumping Fifth Inning

Have you ever been in the midst of a deep sleep and be jostled then continue dreaming only you’re dream takes a weird turn for the worse. Yeah, that sums up an Oliver Perez outing.

Oliver Perez was cruising through the Nationals order until the fifth. Perez walked the leadoff runner, gave up a single and issued another walk to load the bases, single up the middle scoring two After getting an out on a liner to center putting runners at the corners, Perez ran the count full and with the runner going, induced a groundball to second scoring the third run of the inning. Perez surrendered a first pitch line drive but was bailed out by a brilliant defensive play by David Wright who made the risky throw to first to get out of the inning.

I didn’t use hitter’s names there so I could cut and paste that for later use; it’s going to happen again.

Not to bury the lede, but how in the hell did David come up with that ball? That is one of the best plays I’ve seen Wright make in his career. I would put that over that stop in 06 that started a game ending double play in Philly and the diving backward, over his shoulder barehanded grab in San Diego in 05.

After a Casanova turned a double to right into a single, Willie Randolph made a move highlighting his team’s bullpen woes, letting Perez sac bunt the runner over. I’m not going to criticize the decision to run into an out, but if you are, you should be sure your player can put down a simple sacrifice bunt. That’s the second time in the past four games a Major League player could not perform a simple sacrifice bunt.

I imagine a Butch Cassidy and Sundance Kid-esque conversation in the Mets Dugout:

Jerry Manuel: Casanova’s on Skip, who you want here?
Willie Randolph: Leave Perez in.
JM: Are you kidding, were you watching last half inning? He’s lost the plate, he can’t go out there without putting at least two on
WR: Don’t worry, Heilman’s going to kill us anyway.

Motherhumping Sixth Inning

And like a predictably bad movie, Perez left with two on and two out, Heilman walked Milledge to load the bases and then there his patented homerun ball resulting in a grand slam to Lopez.

Motherhumping Seventh Inn…

SIGH

You know what, forget it. I have to get to bed. Tomorrow is Hawaiian Shirt Day at work so…you know, if I want to…I can go ahead and wear a Hawaiian shirt and jeans.

An ugly, ugly, state of affairs.

Before I go, in other news…

Wesley Snipes was sentenced to three years in prison today for failing to pay taxes. Charges have yet to be filed however, for starring in the movie The Fan. (Note: Zing)

New Mop-up Duty Specialist

Aaron Heilman’s new nickname is Flow Bee as he sucks AND he blows.

Good God, I am tired of watching Heilman load the bases. I am tired of the way he purses his lips while looking in for the pitch. I am tired of Notre Dame. I hate the number 48.

Reyes’s error opened the door, and Heilman would have gotten out of the eighth, but I have absolutely no confidence in him right now, regardless of his luck against the Phillies on Saturday.

Second Heilman nickname: That guy who takes a shower while the Mets are in the field in the Eighth.

Give Duaner his eighth inning role back. Now.

The Cubs are a hot team. Zambrano is a dyed in the wool ace. The Mets were likely to score one or less, but game ball to Aaron who took the Mets completely out of the game.

Never blog angry

A rivalry is building in between the Mets and Phillies for the first time since, well ever. Friday night set the tone for the top two candidates for the National League East‘s season long battle for dominance. Forget ESPN’s Red Sox-Yankees obsession; it’s stale, over-hyped and cliché; Mets-Phillies is Major League Baseball’s main event.

Game One

Johan did what Johan was brought in to Due on Friday night, pitching striking out 10 and giving up another solo shot to Chase Utley. Though he was charged with three homeruns, two came on after Santana left the game in the seventh after Heilman was brought in to deliver his trademark gasoline ball to a two on spark. I have Zero faith in Heilman. The stand out performance on offense was premature MVP candidate David Wright who went 4-4 with a triple, two doubles, a single and a walk. The heart-stopping moment was delivered on a stolen base attempt by Jose Reyes, sliding into Chase Utley’s knee. Though Reyes was shaken up momentarily; no significant injury was sustained. I really wish he would slide in feet first, but he’s not likely to change his stolen base technique even at this early stage of his career.

Game Two

On Saturday, the southern half of the country was deprived of another classic. Fox unwisely chose to broadcast the Dodgers Braves game to the south and southwest United States. A Fox spokesman released the statement, “Come on, it’s not like the Braves are on TV 150 times a season on a nationally broadcast basic cable channel. The Braves are America’s team in this the year 1995”

As I live in the area given sub par baseball on Fox’s game of the week, I was forced to listen to the game via the Phillies broadcast delivered by play by play man and Campbell’s Soup pitchman Harry Kalas who’s deep voice and monotone cadence lulls listeners to sleep and diverts any and all audience attention from actual game play.

I cannot, in good conscience give any insight into the plays of Saturday’s game, as I was blacked out of MLB TV coverage.

I was treated to Fox’s “Bonus Coverage” of the bottom of the eighth. The game is over and I still can’t believe Heilman struck out two with the bases loaded rather than, say, give up a grand slam on the first pitch of the first at bat of the hitter he faced. The inning was prolonged by misreads/terrible reactions by both Carlos Beltran and Angel Pagan. I still don’t trust Aaron Heilman any farther than I can throw him. And with my bad knee, I shouldn’t be throwing anyone.

Why can’t Fox broadcast the rest of the game in their stupid “Bonus Coverage?” What’s the point of showing only the eighth, not the ninth, getting the audience interested and then going to local news?

Howie Long: We now are going to take you to the Meadowlands where the Giants trail the Cowboys 20-18 with less than 30 seconds remaining:

Joe Buck: The Giants have the ball at the 49; they’re going to have to get to at least the 35 to get into Tynes’ FG range and call time out right away. This play right here will decide if the Giants will advance to the NFC playoffs.

Troy Aikman: It’s plays like this that really test a quarterbacks patience. Eli has to focus, take his time. He has 20 seconds left, but a sack or even an incomplete pass brings up forth down. The Giants need a big gain here.

Joe Buck: Eli drops back to pass, he’s got time, rolls right, HE’S GOT BOSS AT THE 31, THE GIANTS CALL TIME OUT AND BRING THE FIELD GOAL UNIT ON TO TRY FOR THE WIN!

VOICE OVER: This has been a presentation of the NFL on Fox, we now return you to our studio broadcast.

Jimmy Johnson: Whew-we, that was exciting! NFC Football at it’s finest. I wonder if Tynes will make the field goal. I guess we’ll never know.

Now on Fox Four News, what you don’t know about ice cream, may be fatal…

Wright and Reyes were the big contributors today, according to the box score, anyway. David may be at his peak as a hitter and the League should be scared.

This series doesn’t quite have a playoff feel, but it’s as close to October as imaginable in April and each month the calendar page turns, the pressure intensifies. This isn’t the familiar struggle against Atlanta; a city 850 miles away with an indifferent fan base. Philly is a train ride away, a rabid fan base and a team that took the east by a game in 2007. The Mets collapsed, but they own the title NL East Champs. Disregard that other New York team; it’s two relatively meaningless series’ nothing more than six regular season games. 2008 is Mets Phillies.

Mr. Met verses Philly Phanatic (a San Diego Chicken rip-off, but whatever)
Reyes versus Rollins,
Wright versus Howard,
El Duque versus Moyer (obligatory age reference),
Beltran versus Burrell.
Potent pitching staff versus pervasive power throughout the lineup

This is Us versus Them.

The Mets may have won the series, but make no mistake, the NL East is far from over.

“As a teammate, I know, I see when somebody’s not happy and I didn’t think he was happy,” “I tell him ‘I want you to be the Reyes that you always have been. ”

“We’re happy he’s doing it again. We don’t care if other teams get offended.” – Carlos Beltran

I think Carlos has stumbled into this year’s marketing slogan:

The 2006 Mets: Our Team, Our Time
The 2007 Mets: Your Season has Come
The 2008 Mets: Fuck’em if They Can’t Take a Joke.

Last night’s game was the Mets baseball I’ve missed for the past dozen months. The Mets played the way a division contender plays. Maine wasn’t dominant but good enough to win. The bats did their share and our leadoff man reminded me why he’s my favorite player. The trademark ear-to-ear smile was desperately missed.

Here’s the chip on our shoulder, we dare you to try and knock it off.

I turned on the game in the first inning and apparently Tuesday’s series opener was Roger McDowell day at Shea Stadium. Every player was wearing his number 42. I never would have guessed Roger was that important to the Mets. Sure he was a integral part of the World Champions bullpen but I really would have expected In fact, I assume that McDowell’s stature must have impacted Lastings Milledge and Paul LoDuca as they convinced their team to also wear 42. Amazing. I would have thought that Gary Carter or Keith Hernandez would receive that honor first. Of course they could have been honoring Butch Huskey…

Sorry for the random post, I started watching the archive at midnight and finished up around 3 AM.

Great game today out of Jose and David. With old age such a factor on this roster, the two are crucial to the Mets success. Its almost fortunate that Reyes didn’t hit for the cycle. After every Reyes homerun, he seems to hit a funk at the plate with an increased uppercut (see Jose‘s last at bat for a visual aid). Walks, singles, doubles and triples are fine.

Mike Pelfrey looked very solid in 7 scoreless. With El Duque and Pedro out, Pelfrey is essential to the Mets chances.

Welcome back Filthy Sanchez!

I have missed having Sanchez in the pen. A 6-0 lead in the ninth was a perfect environment for the goggled one’s comeback. Given the cold weather, the teams early mediocre start, Willie would have gambled putting in Sanchez in a key situation.

The Bottom line is that the Nationals are a weaker team the Mets need to make a habit of beating this year.

The Great Booing Debate of ‘08

Every year, it seems, the debate of to boo or not to boo is an issue in the Mets season (though it’s usually not until May). I suppose last seasons end left some residual angst and cynicism. For the record, I feel that booing should be exclusively reserved for two reasons:

1. Lack of effort. Steve Trachsel’s give up performance in the 06 NLCS comes to mind, a certain Braves southpaw’s third of an inning, this extends to the Mets front office.

2. Players you truly hate. Whether based on previous transgressions or solely on douchebaginess. Roger Clemens, Derek Jeter, Chipper Jones, Guillermo Mota, Jimmy Rollins.

If you’re going to boo a slumping player, cheering for him during success is hypocritical.

I would hope fans at Shea were booing management and Omar Minaya giving up on Lastings Milledge and trading him to a division rival. Kind of insulting to Church and Schneider but whatever. If that isn’t the case, it wasn’t like Lastings demanded a trade out of Queens. I can understand harboring ill will towards Paulie Ballgame after the Mitchell Report and some of his remarks. Who are we, Astros fans? It’s not that big of a deal, just bizarre.

Seriously, the whole Jackie Robinson day is getting out of hand.

Stop writing your angry email.

I agree that Robinson’s contributions to baseball were monumentally important to the game of baseball as well as American culture. I also agree that his courage to break the color barrier and the man himself should be and is respected universally throughout baseball.

That said, Jackie Robinson thing borderline absurd. Every player wearing 42 is off-putting and confusing. When I see Reyes or Wright not wearing their respective numbers my brain takes a minute to adjust. Besides that, it’s creepy. What’s next, every player hitting righthanded? The broadcast team referring every player to as Jackie Robinson? Rachel Robinson starting at second and leading off? It’s becoming like that bad SNL sketch in the 80’s after Bart Giamatti died and MLB mandated every player change their name to Bart and the sport would be known as Bartball. Tap the brake, MLB, it’s getting ridiculous. His number is retired in every ballpark in the Majors; we named a rotunda in his honor at Citi Field; he has a whole day. Every player in 42 is excessive and unnecessary.

Resume your outraged email.

This is getting depressing. The fact that this was the last season opener Shea will host is merely a sad footnote. Vintage Oliver Perez today:

Step 1. Cruse through the order
Step 2. Lose the plate
Step 3. ?????????
Step 4. Profit

Though this was disappointing (speculate on your own as to your personal level of devastation), it’s not cause to start the panic. The Mets had what was essentially a shortened spring training due to injury, the sample size on the season is too small to indicate any kind of trend and the Phillies are a legitimate National League contender. The sky isn’t falling. Yet.

That said, Jose Reyes has got to draw more walks to get on base. Again, it’s a small sample size, but one walk in 27 at bats is not confidence inspiring especially when coupled with a .250 OBP. It’s been said many times, by many other Mets bloggers and writers that the as Jose Reyes’ season goes, the Mets season will go with it. That is a fairly obvious statement since Reyes leads off the offense, thus drawing more at bats, Reyes also sets the tone, for what that’s worth.

A six game period is a small sample size, so this is anecdotal at this stage of the season. Six home runs in six games is troublesome though half of those homers were surrendered by pitchers now on the DL (Wise 1 and Pedro 2)

This is depressing me…

Carlos Delgado’s solo shot was a temporary stress release. At this stage in Carlos’ career, those will likely be much like Mike Piazza in his last years in New York: impressive and infrequent.

Sample size aside, this season hasn’t started out as confidence inspiring.

With El Duque having a setback (surprise), tomorrow Mike Pelfrey’s performance can change that.

One more thing, Wally Mathews, in his game recap, shows he’s a class act:

Granted, the Phillies won, 5-2, but as long as you don’t measure success by the final score, there were plenty of positives to take home.

Rick Astley got some airplay. Jimmy Rollins got hurt. It was sunny. And even though Tuesday felt a lot less like the start of something new than a continuation of something old, you just know it can get only better.

Stay classy Wally!

I’m not even going to rant about today’s loss to Atlanta. Yuck.

Never blog angry.

However, it never fails to amaze me how a few months of winter can make me forget how terrible the FOX broadcast team of Joe Buck and Tim McCarver are at their chosen profession. During the top of the ninth, McCarver contrasted Rafael Soriano’s cool demeanor to Jose Reyes’, and I’m quoting this, “zest for life.”

I know.

What the hell does that mean? Is Jose some kind of pro life extremest roaming the streets of New York City and other Major League cities exacting retribution on abortion doctors and blowing up planned parenthood clinics?

Maybe Jose should start a hip hop boy band called Zest 4 Lyfe. Jose could get a giant tattoo with the band’s name across his chest, David Wright could be the shy one, Ryan Church could be the gay, er, I mean, artistic one and Joe Smith could be the bad boy. I smell a sitcom.

Great offensive output from the Mets tonight. Carlos Beltran and David Wright were robbed of home runs. Carlos robbed by to a blown call by the umpires and David due to the fact that the Marlins play in a ridiculous football stadium with a 600 foot deep centerfield fence. Carlos getting screwed doesn’t change my belief that instant replay is unnecessary for Major League Baseball. Would instant replay have given Beltran a homerun instead of his third double? For those of you who say yes, ask an Oklahoma Sooner fan about the game against Oregon. When baseball is dragged reluctantly into adopting something new, I doubt they embrace it with open arms. The umpires get it right so often that when they blow a call, it’s a glaring error.

Also, throwing a red flag on the field is effeminate and demeaning for both the manager and umpire crew.

Regardless of the blown call, I can’t imagine why the crew reversed the initial homerun ruling. Rick Reed is a great umpire and crew chief. If Carlos would have sold it more, he would have picked up the first Mets home run of 2008.

BTW, if Carlos hits 73 more homeruns this year, will he get an asterisk (in a good way) home run king title?

David Wright is just raking at the plate. David’s off-season work we’ve heard about paid off, for the first three games anyway. The Mets need a big season out of Wright this year to supplement Delgado’ decline. That diving stop at third was a gem and more surprisingly, David didn’t airmail the throw over Delgado to a hotdog vender on the concourse area. When David hits his prime, it’s going to be scary.

Castillo is growing on me. Luis is a tough out. If he can stay healthy, the Mets may finally have the one-two table setters they thought they had with Kaz Matsui and Jose Reyes.

Castillo could be the Mets answer to Dan Uggla. That guy scares the crap out of me. They have a lot of hitters that scare the crap out of me. The Florida Marlins are afraid of success. If they wouldn’t have run Joe Girardi out of town, the NL East could be better than the NL West this year.

Bottom line, great cathartic win after Pedro’s injury and walk-off loss last night. This season might not be a total disaster after all.

Around the National League East

In case you missed it, Scott Spiezio has been given a minor league contract with Atlanta. Braves general manager Frank Wren was quoted as saying, “Well ya know, a big part of our fan base are douche bags. With Andruw [Jones] going to LA, we felt that took a lot away from our appeal. With Chipper [Larry Jones] and of course Tommy [Glavine] coming back, we felt we were one player away from a complete team of douche bags. Scott brings a heavy douchbagginess factor to our organization that we feel will restore the Atlanta Braves to the franchise of douchiness excellence we’ve established over the past two decades.”

Excuse the absence for the last two days; I was attending the National Grammar Rodeo in Canada. I’m not sure if I’ll be returning next year, it’s just not about the grammar anymore.

That’s what she said…