Oh, there’s a big surprise. That’s incredible. I think I’m gonna have a heart attack and die of not surprise! – Me, after hearing about Alou’s injury

Alou’s out with an injury until mid-May. Should Alou fall off the toilet and break his hip or strain his oblique playing canasta, he could be out until the All-Star Break or longer. Moises Alou is this year’s Pedro Martinez: He might be back at some point, but don’t count on it. It’s time to find someone else to shoulder the load.

I love Endy Chavez, but he isn’t an everyday corner outfielder. Marlon Anderson and Damien Easley platoon? Yuck. Fernando Martinez might see an August call up, but it will be a cup of coffee, at most a doughnut. The Mets, who have no one in the system to press into immediate service, must look outside the organization.

I would write a long rant about trading a young outfielder with potential for a sub par outfielder who strikes out too much and offensively challenged catcher who’s lucky if he hit his weight, but that would be counterproductive. Instead, let’s see who’s out there…
(more…)

As per usual, Lonestar Mets brought you news before it happened. From the Daily News:

A report in the Rocky Mountain News said the Mets were close to signing Hernandez, but club sources say nothing is close to being done. They say Hernandez and Kyle Lohse have been in the mix for weeks as signees should the club need a veteran starter.

For the moment, however, one baseball person who has spoken to Omar Minaya recently came away with the impression that the Mets GM is still very hopeful about acquiring Santana.

That’s right, Lonestar Mets can smell a lie like a fart in a car*. In related news, it seems the Twins make make a Santana deal within the next ten days. Don’t rush out and buy your Livan Hernandez jerseys quite yet.

*EDITOR’S NOTE: LONESTAR METS CAN ALSO SMELL A FART LIKE A LIE IN A CAR, FOR WHATEVER THAT’S WORTH

According to a report Friday in the Rocky Mountain News, the Mets are “close” to a deal for free-agent starter Livan Hernandez, who could provide a boost for their rotation.

[Lonestar Mets reading about the upcoming Giants Superbowl]

Omar: We are close to signing Livan Hernandez.

[Lonestar Mets reads a piece on Eli Manning and Joe Namath]

Omar: Sir!

Lonestar Mets: What?

Omar: I’m close to signing Livan Hernandez; do you think he’s any good?

Lonestar Mets: I don’t watch Diamondback games.

Omar: Well have you heard anything about him?

Lonestar Mets: No.

Omar: You’ve never heard anyone say anything about this pitcher?

Lonestar Mets: I find it’s best to stay out of other teams affairs.

Omar: [Shuffles his scouting reports] What about this free agent right-handed starter?

Lonestar Mets: [Doesn’t look up] He sucks.

Omar: It’s the same pitcher; you’re not even paying attention!

Lonestar Mets: No, I wasn’t.

Omar: I don’t think your Manager Willie would appreciate…

Lonestar Mets: I don’t appreciate your ruse, sir.

Omar: My what?

Lonestar Mets: Your ruse; Your cunning attempt to trick me.

Omar: I only pointed out that you weren’t paying any attention to what I’m doing.

Lonestar Mets: I hope it feels good.

Omar: You hope what feels good?

Lonestar Mets: I hope it feels so good to be right. There is nothing more exhilarating than signing old pitchers with major shortcomings, is there?

Omar: [Threatening tone] This is the last time you’ll hear rumors that I’m going to sign Livan Hernandez!

Lonestar Mets: They will be missed.

Omar: Screw you!

Lonestar Mets: Screw me?

I went ahead and re-punctuated the relevant part of the story and italicized for effect:

According to a “report” Friday in the Rocky Mountain “News“, the Mets are “close” to a “deal” for free-agent “starter” Livan Hernandez, who could provide a “boost” for their “rotation.”

Tired of waiting on the Twins to make a move on Santana? Why not dust off that long time rumored chestnut of the half-brother of our current disabled list resident in order to force the Twins into action. Why not? It’s believable isn’t it? How many times have we seen Livan Hernandez rumored to be on a short list to bolster pitching? And since when is the Rocky Mountain News an authority on breaking Mets news?

Course it is. Ya think if I leave that story under my pillow at night, the Rocky Mountan News Rumor Fairy might come by and leave a quarter? The point is, how do you know the Rocky Mountain News Fairy isn’t a crazy glue sniffer? “Build model airplanes” says the little fairy, but we’re not buying it. Next thing you know, there’s money missing off the dresser and your daughter’s knocked up, I seen it a hundred times. Hey, if you want me to take a dump on a page and mark it guaranteed, I will. I got spare time. But for right now, for your sake, for your daughter’s sake, ya might wanna think about acquiring a quality pitcher.

Threats won’t work; the Twins could live without those five prospects (or four prospects and Ryan Church depending on who’s handicapping at the moment) rumored to be in the deal. The Mets are sure as hell not going to throw in Wright or Reyes to sweeten the deal. They can’t afford to take on anybody else; they cost too much. What would expedite the Twins trade of Santana? Maybe only having two teams in a bidding war instead of three. The Red Sox and Yankees have honed the art of not getting played off each other until the sum of the parts leaving Beantown or the Big Apple far exceeds the sum of the returning player.

My gut tells me that this is a ploy, we’ll sure see in the next few days but I doubt this works.  

God this year’s Hot Stove season sucks!

I found this link via Metsblog regarding the Mets dealing for Johan Santana:

According to people with knowledge of the discussions, the Mets have offered top pitching prospect Deolis Guerra, along with center fielder Carlos Gomez and pitchers Kevin Mulvey and Phil Humber.
The Twins like those players. They’ve told the Mets they’d have a done deal if New York would add prized outfield prospect Fernando Martinez.

Now granted, any statement that begins with “According to people with knowledge of the discussions” has as much athority as Brittney’s secret alien love child on the cover of the Weekly World News but it is however…interesting.

Here’s a picture of Santana with some kind of trophy. It looks real important.

The chance to land a pitcher of Santana’s stature may never come around again for another decade, maybe more. It is a heavy price tag to land him, knowing the Mets will have to commit to somewhere around twenty million over the next five to six years. But it is…interesting.

Maybe it’s the lack of off-season moves from the Mets front office making me nastogic for the new arrivals of a gold glove, switch hitting centerfielder or a power hitting firstbasemen, or a short lefty closer or a fiery (roided up) catcher.

Maybe it’s flashbacks to a live armed southpaw who was cruising suddenly losing the strike zone or walking the bases loaded holding a one run lead.

Maybe it’s the lingering memories of an unofficial start of spring training delayed and daily reports of a custom shoe not finding it’s way to Port Saint Lucie to cushion a sore toe.

Maybe it’s an ancient pitcher missing a month due to an ambiguous back problem, sore calf, osteoporosis.

Maybe it’s remembering the dread of a looming fifth day when it would again be Lima Time, or Dave Williams or Lawrence and penciling an “L” over that day on my schedule save for some offensive, 10 run explosion that never seemed to show up.

Maybe it’s remembering a once proud bullpen, carousel-ing out to the mound every day in the middle of the sixth to take the ball. There dominant status shrinking each day until there mere sight causes a feeling of uneasiness in every fan’s psyche. Those tired group of arms patching together outs and innings until somewhere around Labor Day, due to shear exhaustion, they can’t seem to hold a four run lead.

I love Martinez and I’m in love with Carlos Gonzalez speed. I love the idea of Kevin Mulvey and Phil Humber. (I just want to be friends with Mike Pelfrey). Those guys could be great. I love prospects; we all love prospects. I loved Alex Ochoa and DJ Dozier. When they were prospects, they were Hall of Famers to be. Every good fan overvalues their prospects.

But you know who needs prospects? The Twins, the A’s, the Devil Rays, the Royals- that’s to whom they are essential. Not a team in the biggest market in the country, with a new stadium under construction. We ARE players in the Santana market because we CAN afford it. And come on, how often do power hitting outfielders with gold glove defense hit the market? Is it two a year now? We can always trade for an outfielder; you can rarely trade for an ace.

The good trades have to hurt. No one makes a trade to get a Cy Young winner and sends back garbage (ok, only Chuck LaMar can get a Cy Young pitcher and send back garbage) and the good ones have to hurt; that’s why they’re good ones.

This deal may not even be for real. It may be yet another rumor in the Santana sweepstakes that’s gone on far to long with little to show for it. Who knows if it’s even real; if Omar has even heard this offer, but if i’m in the room, I say go for it. No one can no for sure. We only know one thing, it is…interesting.