Ditch Castillo. I know he’s got that ridiculous contract, so what. Offload him somewhere. The Mets will have to pay the lion’s share of the freight, so what. He’s not getting any younger or healthier and New York isn’t going to be any easier a place to play in the next few years. This guy could be the next Kaz Matsui except with more trips to the DL. And don’t whine about the economy, use the money you were going to give Bernie Madoff and pay his way out of town.

Give Murphy secondbase to lose Let the guy compete for the deuce in Port St. Lucie. Is Dan Murphy the next piece of the Mets long term core? Hellifiknow. Let’s find out. It beats the hell out of watching Castillo flail at outside pitches all year.

Trade for Nady I may have already written a thousand articles advocating a trade for Nady but since he’s no longer under control of the Pirates and rumored to be shopped by the Yanks, make the deal now. We know Nady. Nady works in New York; sign him now.

Bring Uncle Cliff Back. I have railed against the Mets signing aging players and expecting results many, many times in the past. This is different. Cliffy Floyd won’t be expected to play everyday, shoot, he only played in 80 games last year. Cliff is respected as a veteran leader and clubhouse presence and it isn’t like he’s say, oh I don’t know, a 42 year old player who pees on his hands. I always felt that Cliff’s departure took away some of the great chemistry the Mets had in 2006. Omar is going to bring in some aging has been anyway, might as well be someone we already love.

Sure these moves aren’t as sexy as signing Manny Ramirez. Let’s face it; that is never going to happen. The above moves can allow Omar to concentrate on shoring up the rotation when and if Boras ever decides to let one of his clients sign.

Is a bag of waterlogged baseballs too much to ask for?

From Mets.com

NEW YORK — With holes in their rotation and their bullpen not yet repaired, the Mets have another pitching issue to address, one that might add a starter at the cost of one of their incumbent relievers. Aaron Heilman wants out of the ‘pen and into the rotation, or, if that can’t be arranged, out of the Mets

Well one of those things is definitely going to happen. The other, not so much. Maybe Aaron is hoping that some other team hasn’t watched him pitch in the past two seasons…or doesn’t have access to video…or the internet…or doesn’t read any newspapers…or talk to people.

Anyway, this idiot had something to say:

“The object the entire time has never been to get out of New York,” agent Mark Rodgers was quoted as having said. “The object is to get out of the bullpen.”

Rogers continued. “Well that and the other object was to set a new example of horrid relief pitching in New York, the likes of which eclipses Doug Sisk and I think he’s done that without a shadow of a doubt.”

Ok, he really didn’t say that, but what a pair on this guy. Unless of course, Aaron is so unhappy in Queens he wants a trade at any cost. If you remember (I try to block most Heilman related memories) this isn’t the first time him and his douchy agent have tried this. Then of course, there was Aaron’s public unhappiness with his lack of a parking spot, after his last appearece cost the team a trip to the World Series.

Honestly, I could live the rest of my life and never see Heilman in a Mets uniform and I’m sure I have a good number of companions on that opinion. You know what, scrap that, I am so tired of watching Aaron blow leads late in games, it almost made me hate baseball last season so I’m going to go ahead and write little sarcastic digs after random paragraphs, ok? Great:

Now, though, after a season in which he fell into disfavor and then into disuse, Heilman wants to be used in a role he considers better suited for his skills, and for the first time, he has reinforced his request with an expressed willingness to leave the organization that developed him if his request isn’t accommodated.

Because why wouldn’t it make sense to plan you rotation around a man you depend on to get to the sixth inning when he couldn’t string together three outs without giving up a home run and/or walking the ballpark.

Because he was the Mets’ primary “crossover” pitcher — a pitcher used against right-handed and left-handed hitters — his ineffectiveness affected the bullpen more than the shortfall of any other reliever.

And by crossover, it means he’s equally ineffective against right and left-handed batters.

I’m tired of this already. I would like to thank Aaron for lowering his trade value even lower (if that’s even possible.) Incidentally, the story currently up, written by Marty Noble originally linked to a story by Jim Mallory and was much more critical of Heilman.

Anyway, the point of all of this is that any and all things from Notre Dame suck sweaty balls …except Mark Bavaro.

NOTE: the alternate title I had in mind was Aaron Heilman and the horse he rode in on.

Anyway, here’s a picture of David with a semi-hot piece of ass and some douche from America’s got talent wearing a vest, and an untucked shirt.

Also, check out the super cool Swatch watch David won at Chuckie Cheese playing skeeball earlier that day.

Hot Stove Season

As of Midnight on Friday, the exclusivity period ends on free agents. I’m not certain who I’m sold on this year, I do know who I don’t want. A few thoughts:

Manny Ramirez
I really hope Manny gets signed somewhere right away so we get spared the “Manny to the Mets” rumors we’ve read for the past three seasons. Omar would do a disservice to the Mets chasing Manny this year rather than solidifying rebuilding the bullpen and finding a power bat to anchor the lineup. (Note: Manny is not that bat)

Trevor Hoffman
I saw a note on Trevor Hoffman no longer dealing with the Padres front office. Hoffman’s probably a Hall of Famer, but at his age the Mets should definitely pass. Signing Hoffman means the Mets have learned nothing from the last two seasons.

K-Rod
Looks like K-Rod isn’t going to be an Angel next season, which sucks for us for a number of reasons
-I’ve cooled on the guy, with his delivery; he’s half a season away from a rotator cuff injury. For the money he wants, I don’t want to risk it. Also, saves are a stupid and overrated stat. Sign Fuentes and be done with it.
-K-Rod leaving Anahiem means they’ll too likely target Fuentes.

C.C. Sabathia
The “jewel of the free agent market” this year will surely be considered C.C. Sabathia. He is only 28 and accomplished front line starter, I’ve cooled. His weight bothers me. Take a look at this line:
21-8 3.48 ERA 2CG 222.2 IP 157 SO
Oh, that’s Bartolo Colon’s 2005 Cy Young season. Granted, Sabathia is a better pitcher but I see C.C. (get it?) as another Bartolo Colon. The extra weight makes him vulnerable for arm, back and shoulder problems. For the money he wants, the Mets could do better spending it elsewhere. Pass

I have a feeling we’re in for a pretty boring off-season.

So instead of sparing myself what I’m sure will be another devastating end to a season, I’ll be watching the next week of games. I have determined a formula to help put this new brand of baseball into perspective.

The way I figure (without actually researching each game; too painful), the bullpen gives up two runs for every out recorded. Therefore:

Defensive outs needed when the starting pitcher is removed + 1 = Run lead needed to ensure victory

Meaning, if it’s the top of the seventh inning and no outs, the Mets will need a ten run lead to secure a win. If the starter leaves earlier, like in at the end of the fourth, the Mets will need a sixteen run lead. I will be forwarding this to the Commissioners’ office and petitioning the league to adopt this formula to calculate the new stat MBSV (Mets Bullpen Save)

Kidding aside, this method makes watching this crap less gut wrenching when we cough up a lead. The rationalization that “we weren’t really winning” is about all the comfort I can muster these days.

Today the Mets announced that number 13 won’t be back on the mound anytime soon. I’m not a doctor but and sentence that starts with “increased inflammation in a tendon in Wagner’s left elbow despite rest” is usually accompanied by the phrase “requiring surgery and long term rehab.”

Also, from the same piece:

The Mets would not discount the possibility that Wagner may have suffered structural damage in his elbow, admitting only that they won’t know for sure until the swelling subsides.

Wagner’s season is over. The hope that the pen could hold it together long enough for him to get some rest is gone. What’s worse is there is absolutely no one who is capable of filling the closer’s role. Kunz maybe that man someday, but not today.

Even if the Mets can slug their way to the NL East title, there is no way to succeed in October minus a closer. Let’s have a look at what’s left of the Mets relief corps or as I’ve come to call the them, “Midnight Meat Train; THE MOST TERRIFYING RIDE YOU’LL EVER TAKE”:

Is it just me or does that sound like a title to a gay porn flick?

Aaron Heilman: Bust

Duaner Sanchez: Would have been a great candidate prior to July 31, 2006. Anyone have a time machine?

Pedro Felicano: Specialist

Scott Schoeneweis: Specialist

Joe Smith: Most likely a specialist or mid relief guy.

Brian Stokes: Mop up reliever/long man

Luis Ayala: A fresh arm to eat innings, not even candidate to be an early inning stopper

The Mets have publicly toyed with the idea of moving a starter to the bullpen, but unless we’re moving Johan out there, I don’t see it happening. With Maine’s sore arm, consecutive appearances aren’t sensible or likely. Pelfrey has finally figured out how to be a starter. Ollie is the biggest headcase to pitch for the Mets since Armando Benitez. Pedro might have success, but with his record of injury, a shift to the pen won’t be prudent. Most of that speculation was likely a smokescreen to give Minaya some leverage on what was left of the trade market.

What’s worse, this or Braden Looper circa 05? Hmmmmmm…

Manuel dismissed any lingering patience with his veteran relievers after a loss yesterday that was unacceptable and unfathomable. The Pirates essentially were trying to surrender at Shea, yet the Mets bullpen burned the white flag and another sure victory went up in smoke.

So following a 7-5 loss to Pittsburgh, Manuel said this about who will provide the key outs late in games the rest of this season: “Everything from here on out is a possibility.” Manuel shared some options at a post-game news conference, but The Post has learned all three main scenarios the organization is now mulling:

1. Have Eddie Kunz, who has all of three major league appearances, reprise his Double-A closing role, at least until Billy Wagner returns, which is currently scheduled for Monday. This is the most likely choice.

2. Keep Brian Stokesin the rotation and call upon either John Maine or Oliver Perez to serve as a multi-inning fireman. For now the Mets don’t want to mess with Mike Pelfrey by requesting a rotation-to-pen change.

3. Summon top pitching prospect Jon Niese for the rotation and use Stokes plus either Maine or Perez to serve as the main late-inning relievers.

Kunz, Maine and Perez all said they were game for any assignment. Yet, all of these scenarios are drenched in peril. Kunz lacks experience or a dependable second pitch. Stokes has just one major league start this year and was a culprit last year in a Tampa pen that was one of the worst ever. Maine is only now ready to come off the DL from a strained rotator cuff, so you wonder how his arm would respond to a change in preparation. Perez has been the Mets’ co-best starter with Johan Santana for two months.

It speaks to Manuel’s desperation – and that of his team – that he is considering the radical with 42 games remaining. He said, “We can’t continue to perform this way late in games.” But a loss like yesterday’s is just so demoralizing and the pen problems now are so episodic that Manuel lost his serenity and put all contingency plans on the table.

Finally someone in the Mets organization is ready to face the cold hard facts. Aaron Heilman is ineffective as a closer or even eighth inning work, Pedro Feliciano and Scott Schoeneweis are specialists and not suited to pitch to more than one or two batters and that Joe Smith is over worked and under matched for the role the Mets expect him to play.

Those plans are all valid and logical options for stopping the bleeding. A few thoughts:

-Moving one of the starters to the pen is dicey as robbing Peter to pay Paul doesn’t raise the talent level.

-A better option than Niese replacing Maine or Perez probably would have Niese assigned the role of long reliever. Keep in mind, it the Mets were way in front or out of the race, Niese would be up for a cup of coffee and likely in that role anyway. The Mets desperately need a pitcher that can be called upon to get 6-12 outs per appearence. An attempt to keep him away from situational pressure is offset by the Mets competing in a pennant race in New York in late August and September. The pressure is everywhere.

-For some reason, I think a move to the bullpen might somehow affect the rock of mental stability that is Oliver Perez

-El Duque would be great here, but I have a feeling he’s done for good.

-Kunz in a more substantial role, even closer just makes sense. Even if he blows a save or two, it would have happened anyway with Heilman or Schoeneweis.

-Stokes to the pen probably won’t help much, though it can’t hurt in comparison to recent pen performance.

Bottom line is this team desperately needs an almost complete bullpen overhaul. The three options Sherman has laid out may ease the pen’s workload, but an outside arm is essential. Minaya desperately needs to work a post deadline deal or start signing players off the scrap heap if there is a prayer of saving this season.

Jimmy McNulty: A lot of chatter from the hoppers in the Eastern on the wire about something’s going on with this Mets team. Christ, this crew that just two years ago owned the Eastern. Now they don’t have a pot to piss in. Doesn’t make sense.

Bunk Moreland: look at the arms, Jimmy…mmmhhhhm…Fuckin’ A.

Jimmy McNulty: They just don’t have the backing to come down on these things anymore. If front office could have got its shit together, we could have gotten a difference maker. As it stands now, don’t no one on this team have any idea what’s going on.

Bunk Moreland: Shhiiiittttttt Jimmy, Phillies gonna win this thing by seven games anyhow. Hell, Mets be lucky to finish third this shit keeps up.

Jimmy McNulty: Fucking chain of command. You know, you pull all these wins out against these mope teams and what? We bring up some no account hurler and make a little noise, it gooses the stats, but it’s not enough to make a difference and get out from under, not with the pounding we’re’ taking in the bullpen. But if we can make it look like one hump, say the Heilman, could get three outs without getting dogged…another winning streak? Shit, you’ll get some attention. All’s we gotta do is find a pattern.

Bunk Moreland: Nah ain’t gonna have no part a’ this shit, Jimmy. Man’s gotta live by a code. You can do this shit, but everybody know bullpen ain’t got no prayer anyway.

Jimmy McNulty: What the fuck can we do, Bunk? If we only were in the Western…

The roster moves were likely born out of necessity instead of a shift in team philosophy. With Ryan Church’s return uncertain, Moises Alou out for the season, John Maine and Billy Wagner both struggling with injury and no help to be found at the deadline, what else are they going to do? Bring up the young kids, why not?

Although the Mets offense has been failing lately, they should be able to compensate for Church’s extended absence. The most pressing concern is the state of the bullpen which will require a intense off-season overhaul. None of the current arms are capable of closing in Wagner’s place, and the odds of a 23 year old rookie closing in a pennant race aren’t in the Mets’ favor.

But take heart, the Mets don’t figure to be in the pennant race much longer. Of course a quick and early end to the season might prove refreshing than another August/September swoon and slow death of a team that is less than the sum of its parts.

So what the hell, lets all sit back and watch these four prospects who, depending on who you believe are either highly talented or overvalued. The July surge was nice, but likely an anomaly in another high expectation, also-ran Mets season plagued once again by a stagnant offense and poor bullpen performance.

2009 isn’t that far away.

You know…the one thing I look forward to all year long is watching the BITCH ASS fans Astros squirm. I hate the Astros and seriously they need to come up with something other than the generic freakin’ boo Mets. As a Mets fan, I am upset that we didn’t pull it off tonight. Lonestar Met is right! They are overworked! We have all the key elements and players to do some damage this year.

I am also upset because I missed that bad ass catch that Murphy had because I was watching Wigginton. I always loved his devotion and passion for the Mets. It really looked like he had a homerun and I would have cheered for him. Realizing what I missed, when my husband is giving me brutal high fives. I hated to tell him I missed that moment, but I had a good reason. Oh, and the only reason the Astros actually did well the past two games is because of a past Mets. Freakin’ Matusi!

xoxox
Mrs. Lonestar Mets

I don’t know what else to add, folks. I’m going to go get drunk.

Lets try and not get swept…

If Mets management’s mantra is “we are comfortable with what we have” because they cant make a trade, that’s understandable. If they really believe that, they’re crazy. Forget Manny, he’d be great to have in the lineup, but I doubt the Mets can slug there way to a pennant.

Pitching is going to win the East. Our starting pitching is solid to adequate, depending on Pedro. The bullpen however, is fragile to critical. I would love Houston Street. I don’t know about the price tag Seattle is asking for and supposedly Fuentes is off the market.

If the Mets bullpen stays the same, look for another late August, mid-September melt down.

Just make a deal, Omar. You’ve got 25 minutes